Stop. Collaborate & listen.

Ice is back with my brand new invention....

Is your head nodding against your own will yet?

In preparation of this post, I checked out this link and discovered I have been rockin' out and teaching my kids the incorrect lyrics of Vanilla man's hard work. Apparently it is a really good thing that I have been singing it wrong.

"Bum rush?"
"Wax a chump like a candle?"

Say Whhaaaatttt? Whatever.
Regardless of my inability to rap, I sure have been giving it a good try. Need a laugh?
Imagine housewife in green plaid pajama pants. Over sized t-shirt with unidentifiable goop from baby's hands. Mini trampoline. Rapping. Hip-hop. Hand motions. Head nodding. Lots and lots of head nodding. My awesomeness is oozing from the screen right now, isn't it? Word to your mother.

Desperate times call for desperate measures. Since I finally met my goal of losing the love handles, (well, most of them), I made two choices:
a) Scheduled family portraits that I have been putting off for 2 years
b) Quit putting forth any flab to fab effort because duh! I met my goal.

What? What is that word I forgot about? Oh yeah. Maintenance. In order to defeat the chocolate my kids gave me out of their Halloween stash (the chocolate that I stole, hid and devoured), I came up with two solutions to combat those 2 fatal choices.
a) Dance like no one is watching
b) Schedule an emergency hair highlighting appointment before the pictures. Only guarantee that something on me will look good in the pics.

My decision making skills are superb.


Back to my beat box calorie burnin'. My kids figured out how to work the CD player and life has never been the same since, especially my ear drums.

"Pump up the jam, pump it up...........let's get this party started on the dance floor...oh-ah, oh-ay...get your booty on the dance floor...."

Why can't I stop typing the lyrics? I am sorry. Forgive me. I have been reliving the 90's as I type. If you only knew how many I have typed and also erased. Heaven help me. Tomorrow I am breaking out the knotted tee and ratted bangs.

My muscles have been so sore! As I am shaking my child-bearin' hips, I imagine looking like the Dancing with the Stars pro's. I could totally be Julianne's body double, (from the ankles down.....maybe, if I had some spray tan). Flab to fab tip for the week? Shake it.

Speaking of shake it, if these two words are uttered in my home, whether it be in reference to a bottle, rattle or other; my son immediately breaks out with "Shake it, shake it.........shake it like a Polaroid pictuuuuurrrrre!" Complete with gangsta hand signs.

Rock on.

Speaking of things that rock: Cortney is quite the rockin' photographer. If you live in ID or UT, do yourself a favor and have him take your photos. He is even amazing enough to possibly skip getting emergency highlights.

Now, if you will excuse me, I must "check out the hook while my DJ resolves it." What does that mean?


What song do you rock?

shivering

Flab to fab.

As I sit, I can barely type because of the numbing cold in my fingers. The frugal side of me refuses to turn the heat on in our house for a few more days. The kids are ok with it, because I give in and let them watch extra television so that they can stay snuggled in blankets in the couch, scooby-do pajamas and all.
Could it be quite possible that shivering burns calories?


*pause*


Oh, man, do I ever love Google. I am a Googling fanatic. Ta da! Shivering does burn extra calories, up to 400 in an hour. That is awesome. I am not turning the heat on until Christmas. Sorry kids. Mommy is fat. We have to be cold. It is the only way. (umm....besides hard work and exercise....oh, and not eating the Halloween candy)

We put up a pull up bar in the bedroom doorway the other night. I would take a picture of it, but then I would have to clean my room and well.....some teenage habits are hard to break. I could only do one whopping pull-up. 2 days later, I can almost do two. Now that is progress people! By no means do I hope to grow Madonna arms, but a little toning isn't such a bad idea.

For being un-flabilicious, I am quite un-routine. The kids have their mini-tramp out in the family room this week. Rather than actually jump for a long period of time, I sporadically jump on it throughout the day. 10 jumps here, 10 jumps there. But, you know what? It all adds up and THAT is much better than nothing, and very much justifies the fact that I had a cinnamon roll for breakfast. What's wrong with that? Grains and dairy (frosting) all in one. Next time, I will have one with raisins. The health benefits will be phenomenal.

There you go. Flab to fab at the beginning of the Holiday season. Ooohhhhh.... how are we all going to make it until January? What is your combat the calories plan?
Have you turned the heat on in your house yet?